A Sole Soul is Solid
Solace in Solitude
Dedicated to a friend who is going through a hard time.
Know that your ability to take comfort in solitude is not a detriment to your character. If you just nurture it more, you will find it will be a palm tree amongst weeds of society.
You will provide shade, support and sanctuary and will welcome the breeze of comfort whilst they leech in the decorative of the garden.
You will be the back support for a reader leaning themselves on you.
You will be the sanctuary for a child to climb and or hide behind.
You will be the lure for lovers to lay and gaze into each others eyes.
You will be the respite for a traveller seeking shade whilst the weeds do nothing but cause anguish wherever they dwell, providing nothing more than labour for society to constantly maintain the garden of the communities they reside in.
John Taylor Gatto, a famous historian on education, writer and speaker amongst being teacher of the state several times notes well in his books about selection criteria of prestigious schools such as Harvard and Princeton.
The admissions officers choices would surprise many. Eight out of ten people with very high grades were rejected and when asked what they used to select the candidates, the answer was simply ‘hobbies’.
Astounded, John probed further and the reasons were given that hobbies was a part of the CV that peoples honesty could not be faked. They looked for three things in particular. A social hobby, an intellectual hobby and a sporting hobby.
Of note, they didn’t like team sports. They specifically looked for lone sports, even extreme sports which were more likely to imply the person had developed far more internal character and reliance on themselves. They didn’t need a team behind them and were never one to hide behind the support or accolades of others. They only held themselves accountable for their successes or failures.
Something to think about, as we don’t encourage our children enough to be on their own, to learn to be comfortable relying on themselves.
For Me to Be, I had to
allow you to consume
– my humanity
How do I live free? The price is not something most are willing to pay.
You’ll have to settle for being called crazy. You’ll have to settle for being looked at with disgust. You’ll have to have have a spine a mind and an attachment to the divine.
Your skin will need to be thick, your bones strong and robust and jaw solid because they will steal years from you, claw at your appearance and try to squander your character with battering rams.
To them you’re mad, sad, a little bad and on most days a nomad.
You can’t have time for broken hearts, they’re for panderists and you don’t want anyone’s sympathy.
They won’t allow your You.
They want their You, so lose your human attributes, become an it, they, them, this, they’re or some other, become anything but who you are and they’ll let you be.
Just don’t be you, because if you are, the pain of them realising that they can’t Be, will gnaw at them until they won’t let you Be either.
Point in all, you have to lose your humanity, seem a little odd, be a label of some sort, dust it off and accept freedom.
The trap within myself
is liberation from you
Because some of us choose this way.
We don’t hate you, we don’t think anything of you.
No it’s not self absorption, it’s a preference of company.
There are plenty of people that will find you amusing, love you, adore you and can’t live without you.
We can’t live without ourselves, our inner life, our inner voices. The cities and kingdoms we build within. It’s too hard to leave that world and be content in yours, there’s or anyone’s but our own.
Don’t be offended, accept us the way we are, or better yet, reject us, we’re happy either way.
Why are you so quiet?
I sometimes get the feeling that people think I am being snobbish. I assure you I think of myself lower than that of the most vile creatures and try my utmost to be as humble as possible but an admittance in humility is lack of humility so I rather remain silent on most matters.
I’d rather listen to the space between your words to measure the breaths you heave, how heavy or light they exhale, to determine your mood.
The rhythm of those breaths to see if they came from your hearts rhythm or an artificial one that you’ve adopted.
The scent of your breath as it determines the fragrance of your soul.
The tone of breath, as it determines how you wish to deliver them to me.
The unsaid things in that space between breaths, between words as your body moves this way or that way, yes your body has a language I listen to.
The intention of that space if it is distancing or drawing closer as I notice your pupils dilation.
Won’t you let me listen or do you want me to talk over you?
Sometimes we don’t listen to others listening enough.
Leave some unknown for the world
Excerpts from Introversion – four which deserve their own solitude.
Don’t divulge everything inside of you. Keep some for yourself. Keep some for the world.
The whole series can be read here: Introversion Series
You wonder about my condition of solitude, your affection is
appreciated but don’t my dear. I never needed the
accompaniment of people for I decorated banquets and held
balls all inside my mind. I served kings and beggars at the
same table. They ate and drank hands in the same plate and
from the same goblet.
They danced in my hall and enchanted each other’s lives.
They debate fiercely but love tenderly.
They fight the enemies of serenity and solitude with tooth and
nail, invaders are not welcome. So you see my dear, you can
never have me whole for that would mean I release my guests,
their conversations and intimacies. Then my mind would be
emptied and I truly will be alone. Have me part or depart.
I know, you struggle on your own. Try containing yourself. Try not releasing every emotion, every thought, every desire you feel. Try and keep sacred your fantasies. Let them play with each other like children in your mind, like lustful adolescents, like vengeful lovers. Let them be, create a hay field for them to fall softly when they wrestle. Nurture them, give them their respite. They deserve that respect. You deserve that intimacy. You deserve your mind. You will be lusted after more and the talk of the town. Mystery is what lures us all. Leave some unknown for the world.
And they ask me, why don’t you say much?
I ask them, why don’t you say little?
‘That man’s silence is wonderful to listen to’ – Thomas Hardy