Tread lightly

existence

Whilst everyone is busy making their mark in this world, somewhat proving they exist, I’m trying to figure out how not to leave any trace of my existence, no footprint or burden on the earth and it’s inhabitants to accuse me of anything when my corpse is fed back to the earth, lest they extract their rights from me.

-ME

 

What matters

what matters1

I have come to the realisation that the most

important thing for me to do as a human

being is to arouse the deep seated

conviction and belief of the insignificance of

my existence. As a man the goal is amplified

by the reality of it having to be aroused as

quickly and early as possible in life.

As such, my children will learn to be better

human beings by acknowledging their

inferiority from a very young age.

There is no chair available for ego at

the dinner table in my house.

-ME

No one owns your happiness

With sixty dollars I bought my happiness.

With sixty dollars I bought your misery.

My intention was not your unhappiness.

But by no means am I miserly.

You see, you cannot control my happiness.

And if sixty dollars was all it would take,

I’d buy it over and over.

In accident I lost your sixty dollars.

But I bought my freedom from your disdainful glare.

I bought your shackles.

Now you feel bad and you ponder how I turned my negative situation into your negative situation.

Sixty dollars unshackled me but imprisoned you.

What a small price to pay.

The etiquette of men,

Is not to make,

Mention.

Had you followed suit,

You would have been set free

By your,

Generosity.

And I, not knowing any better would have remained ignorantly,

Happy.

 

-ME

The struggle to believe.

uighurs

You claim to be a non-believer,

You deceiver.

I can prove you are a believer of sorts,

Of your thoughts,

Of your retorts,

Sharp as a whip on the flesh of the slave,

You can’t quieten your ego and behave,

You choose the false pretence of freedom,

But don’t know freedom…… is in being a slave,

Not to that ego of yours,

Worshipping yourself,

Without any help,

Proud and arrogant,

Ignorant and blind,

Unkind,

To yourself and mankind,

As you conjecture yet another mental axe to grind,

Pretending to be a searcher,

But you cannot find,

Your mind,

Forever entangled,

Entwined.

My friend that is not the way,

That is not the wine.

Love is the way,

God is love.

Release your ego,

Like you release a dove,

Let your soul soar instead,

To the heavens above

Stop claiming you’re a non-believer when we can see your struggle in wanting to be one.

-ME

Coarse Courses are not a Curse

Alone____by_LeMSC

The curse of the course is that it can be coarse.

The beauty of coarseness can only be appreciated by those who have travelled the course.

Is it then really a curse?

There is only one type of person who has travelled the course.

He alone can show you the beauty of coarseness.

He will most certainly lift the curse.

-me

Loneliness and Solitude

I live in a house full of people but I have always felt alone. Is there a word for that? Is there a condition that the DSM has concocted to be able to monopolise a share of the economy? I don’t know and I don’t care. What I do know is what I feel and coming to grips with that is my journey.

Whilst some may tumble into a catastrophic affair of despair and depression and this by no means is looking down upon their dilemmas, I revel in the loneliness.

I enjoy being alone with my thoughts and am comfortable enough to hear them over and over, voluntarily and involuntarily. Yes we all hear our thoughts and voices, it’s not abnormal and you don’t have a condition. The issue is being able to deal with those voices or thoughts effectively.

Like any learned skill, you need practise and an atmosphere conducive to it. You cannot learn to appreciate, understand, contemplate debate, revel, reject, agree with or change your thoughts if all you ever do is hear the thoughts of others. If all you do is surround yourself with incessant jabber, with never ending mindless drivel and gossip, with a blaring screen beaming alpha rays deep into your subconscious, pretty soon you will forget that the voices and thoughts you hear are actually yours.

They become alien to you and you subject yourself to a myriad of societal presumptions simply based on the fact that what was once an intimate friend or friends, have been away for so long that you barely recognise them.

That is the trickery behind media. It is meant to numb you and place thumbtacks of reminder notes all over your mind map. Reminder notes to cue you into action, action that is not in essence yours truly, but yours artificially.

It’s 2013 and loneliness and solitude are the missing ingredients in a growing person’s arsenal of skills. It didn’t happen overnight. Not even in the last decade but it has been carefully and deliberately orchestrated for over one hundred years. It’s actually been longer than that but technology has seen the advances it needed most in this period and data is now such a king that it has markedly taken effect. Like a fine wine which lays dormant for years on end and then in one fine year alone comes to maturity that makes one believe it happened overnight.

So how does one practise comfort with hearing voices, listening to regurgitating thoughts and piece it all together to live sanely (whatever that means) and without the need for interference from pharmaceuticals or psychotic psychiatrists trying to force a pill down your throat for a condition you don’t have and one that doesn’t exist? (You don’t want to get me started on psychiatry) I don’t know and cannot pretend to be an expert in the area. I do know myself though and how I deal with it. Perhaps I will divulge at a later time but what I do know is that you need skills and practise to get better at anything.

Repetition is the master of skill and mental, emotional, spiritual and social skills are not privy to a different set of rules. In order to get better at dealing with those voices and being comfortable with your thoughts, personally I believe a lot more solitude is in order. How can you deal with your thoughts if you’re being bombarded by thoughts of others? It doesn’t make any logical sense.

 Although the area of neuroplasticity is one of the foremost researched fields in the world of academe, skills learned later in life are not like those etched into our wiring from an early age.  One has to appropriate quiet time and solitude for children. Solitude that doesn’t mean you prop a child in front of a television and leave them alone for 3 hours. Solitude is not that, nor is it mindless swiping on a phone, tablet or computer screen.

Once upon a time solitude carried with it the connotations of wisdom, understanding, learning, peace, tranquillity, enlightenment and self-knowledge. It was not a word that entailed one was alone. Rather it meant that one was engaging at a much deeper near spiritual like level, learning things about themselves and their surroundings through a socialisation with one’s own thoughts, engaging with the characters inside one’s mind and soul, embracing them, visiting them and asking them for their own opinions. Solitude meant that you had created your own inner social circle of friends who could critique you, agree with you, ask you to remain patient if the answers weren’t clear yet or prompt you to action and immediacy if it warranted.

One word, but not as empty and barren in meaning as we now have relegated it. Time in solitude produced artists, poets, scientists, doctors and literary geniuses. It produces scholars and sages, saints and Gnostics. It was the pre-requisite for every single Prophet.

Solitude was the Alchemy of wisdom and achievement. Let the above roll around in your mind, ponder over it but more importantly, make an honest assessment of how much time in solitude you afford yourself for personal growth. If you cannot be bothered for your own sake then bare it in mind for the future generations.