Oh Bilal,
I wonder,
if that stone placed upon your chest,
an act of barbarity,
to stifle your tongue,
from mentioning The One, The One,
to suffocate your breath,
didn’t in fact give you lungs,
didn’t in fact expand your breast.

No stone, nor mountain,
would in future find more peace,
and tremble with love and awe,
than by hearing your voice,
And have your breath between them soar.

God made that stone and every stone, subservient to your Ruh,
your Reeh,
your zephyr that passes between your teeth,
from the well within,
far too deep,
for the materialist minds,
for the societal sheep,
to do anything but misunderstand,
but a thousand years and a thousand more,
still makes every believer weep.


Bilal Ibn Rabah, was the first African to become a Muslim.
He suffered tremendously for his pronouncement of faith.
At a time where the Meccan dignitaries were oppressing anyone, be they of nobility or a layman, the punishment endured by Bilal was nothing short of an extension and proof of the putridness that lay within them, the barbarity and hostility they had towards anyone who professed to believe in One God.

Bilal’s would go on to become one of the most infamous rebellion stories.
A slave to wealthy Meccans, upon hearing the call to believe in one God, the equality of men and women before God that Islam espoused, Bilal defied his owners and would not whip Ammar bin Yassir when asked to make an example out of him. So instead, his owner and the rest of Mecca decided to make an example out of Bilal.

They whipped and punished him, dragged him around town with rope around his neck, even dipped him in boiling water, and still, Bilal could only echo ‘Ahadun, Ahad’, – The One, The One. Two syllables that would enrage the Meccans who wanted him to denounce one God and instead worship and acknowledge their many gods.

Umayyah ibn Khalaf, became enraged, being the owner of Bilal, he set about from the start to orchestrate all the punishment. Finally he had a stone brought forward which took four men to lift and placed it upon Bilals chest. Defiantly, Bilal would not succumb, ‘Ahadun, Ahad’, The One, The One.

It was at this time Abu Bakr, paid for Bilals freedom, when Ummayy had realised he could no longer have any use for him, he thought, being the materialist oppressor he was, that the money is better than a ‘useless’ slave.

Bilal was bought off and set free by Abu Bakr.

Upon hearing his story, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) became extremely fond of Bilal.

Bilal would go on to be the official Mu’adhen (caller) to prayer. The Prophet Muhammad preferred him over anyone else because of his sincerity and piercing voice.

So here we have a man, thought of as nothing, a former slave who was persecuted and tortured by the Meccans, now calling the prayer for all Muslims.
His call, which he saw in a dream, has become the only call to be recited by all Muslims around the world 1430 years later.

Bilal lived out his life alongside the Prophet Muhammad and the companions until the day came when the Prophet (peace be upon him), passed from this world.
Bilal was making the call to prayer and upon reaching the part mentioning the Prophet, broke down inconsolably. He finally finished the call but couldn’t bare to be around the place where the Prophet’s scent still lingered, and joined the convoy of Muslims heading to Damascus and settled there.

One night, he saw the Prophet (peace be upon him), in his dreams who asked him ‘Oh Bilal, why is it that you don’t visit me?’ Upon waking, Bilal immediately packed his belongings and set for Madinah.

Upon arriving, he was greeted by Al Hassan and Al Hussayn (God be well pleased with them), the noble grand children of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). Bilal had a deep fondness for them, because they were so dear to the Prophet. So when they requested he make adhan for prayer, he could not refuse their wish.

Upon initiating the call, suddenly Madinah and all its inhabitants fell into shock. For a moment, they reminisced, they were all taken and thought that the Prophet Muhammad had returned and began crying and coming out into the streets, rushing to the central prayer mosque. Upon arriving the joy was apparent on everyone’s faces, it wasn’t the Prophet, but it was his beloved companion and preferred caller to prayer, Bilal. This was the last time Bilal would call the prayer in Madinah.

Bilal would eventually return to Damascus where he passed away.

His story reminds us today that no matter the persecution, God always has a plan far grander than any punishment oppressors can dish out.

From the chains of slavery, Bilal became the echo on every Muslims lips, five times a day at the minimum, reminding them of God, calling them to prayer, calling them to success, calling them to establishment and rectitude of their affairs, reminding them to reconcile, admit error, improve ones affairs and repent from evil or wrong doing. To ask for forgiveness, and to beg pardon. To have thanks and gratitude for fortune and misfortune, knowing well, whatever lay in stall for them, is of the wisdom and knowledge of their maker.


*Ruh – Soul
*Reeh – Subtle breeze or zephyr

when huwa huwa takes over

-when huwa huwa takes over

be, as though you never were
be, because He never wasnt
be as though you never have
be, because He never hasn’t
i, am not what i think i am
i am, what i think i am not
i’ll be, as though it always is
because He never isn’t


strange vultures of longing hover over what?
burst open you stubborn seed
so that i may spread in the belly of the bee
and rather than a vulture waiting for a carcass
i can be soil waiting for pollen.

maybe it is the season
of life that inspires this.

virgin awakenings to what is fragrant and beautiful
bashful stirrings of butterfly’s
anxious innocence of a love that is too grand for one.

i’ve felt these pangs since I could breathe
and they visit me over and over
fifteen, fifteen and fifteen
perpetually until forty.

and now they haunt me
daily reminders of how i am meant to be
jolts of lightening igniting ignorance
exchanging it for remembrance.

forgive me my Love,
I long for thee down to the pits of me
but why, did You create this world
and keep You from me
except it spurts of sporadity
coming when i am lured by the stench
of pungent mortality.

This world is not for us
it cannot be,
when He is He,
huwa, huwa,
huwa hu


Art source:



how do you unsee
once you have been shown
how do you unknow
once you know
like a seed that has sprouted
wanting to ungrow.

Once you have met the conditions, you are obligated, anything else is treachery and concealment.
The purpose of covering a seed is not to keep it buried, unlike humans, unlike a lie, a seed longs to sprout and it will grow wild if it is shown light. There is no return for the seed once it has sprouted and been touched by light. It cannot return to being concealed. But all it’s nature asks for is to maintain it, prune it, water and keep it’s soil pure so it can bare it’s fruit.

The human being is no different. Lying to yourself, knowing the truth, witnessing it with your spiritual eye, in the depths of you, aware of it’s reality carries with it the weight of acting upon that truth and waiting for the fruits to bare. Like the seasonal changes, so too will you vary, become dry, weak and may even break a few times, or parts of you may fall, but when the environment suits, you will again grow, larger and stronger.

This, you owe to yourself.



Art in background: Huwa by samirmalik on DeviantArt

-Of nearness afar

of neartness afar
-of nearness afar

I needed to find you
Or did you need to find me
Or did you show Him you
Waiting for me to see

Or is this all just triviality
Atoms scattered randomly
Perhaps this artistry just
Be, and it shall Be

Your voice is a breath of mystic allure
Of a beggars longing and hidden grandeur
If only for a moment brings to conjure
It is enough for brokenness a mend, a cure

What do you keep close to your heart
What returns you when you’ve fallen apart
When you miss His push and pull alike
Contraction, expansion, subdue and flight

When His light is not merely enough
When you seek more than angelic touch
When sombre you remain in absence of He
Content in presence though be it deaths clutch

Welcome I’d say to the angel of Death
I’ve been waiting for you since first suckle of breast
This separation from Him is far too much
Take me, don’t wait, even for my last breath

Bury this carcass, it’s naught but a home
Take my riches, and take my throne
Give to the poor and destitute all
My soul has to move, upward roam

To Him to travel to find restitute
To arrive at the original forbidden fruit
To bow and dwell amongst His elite
And find the source of this haunting flute


Inspiration for today…. and probably a few more months.

Patience and Gratitude


If patience were a camel
And gratitude were a camel
I would not care which one
I ride on
– Omar Ibn Al-Khattab

I wish people truly internalised the significance of this saying. I wish it didn’t need explanation for the majority of people. Some will take the superficial beauty and run with it. But it is so much more. I wont explain my internalisation of it, that’s mine alone but I encourage you to spend more than a minute. Spend an hour with this quote and read it over and over again until you find it.

My teacher

gods wine

She drank from love’s wine
so that God was on her breath.

In turn, men became intoxicated from her words.
All they had to do was sit in her gathering
And they would stumble home like drunkards
Dizzy with what they had just experienced.

She had a knack for pulling in the wildest of men,
The strongest of them,
The gentlest of them,
The sincerest of them,
The most loving,
And making them love her.
They loved her as a spiritual mother,
Because she showed them love of Him.
She was braver than a thousand men,
And that is why men didn’t fear her,
But admired her, awestruck and rubbled in front of her.
Small in stature, but a Lioness,
Amongst the jungle of impostors.
I was never one for lies,
So I took to her like a moth to a flame.
There she consumed me,
And I was never to return to humanity the same.

May God sanctify your secret and raise your rank in paradise,
Were it not for you, I would have been hunted down by hyenas.


Hopelessness, despair, depression, hope

In a talk about hopelessness and depression, Hamza Yusuf drives home the message for all humankind to stand strong, look up, have hope, change their focus and know their destination.

Don’t despair, be in it, be in it until your last breath!

Watch the short talk here: