In whirlwind violence, in it I ride,
Contain my silence, to myself confide.
Silence isn’t always passivity.
Containment isn’t always quaint.
Introversion isn’t always this neat and beautiful inner world we live in.
It’s a choice for some of us. A conscious choice.
Some have the ability to force our way on to the world, to extrovert our steps higher into profile, but still we choose to turn inwards.
It isn’t pretty as this doesn’t come naturally.
It is an inward battle of always trying to keep the lid on things.
Some of us are blessed with families where we can pop the lid around loved ones who understand us and give us the space to explode after implode.
Personality tests aren’t proof that you were born that way, they are signs of what you have become at that current moment in your life. That moment was built up to by a succession of moments preceding it, environmental exposure, experiences, ingrained beliefs, indoctrinated sometimes, self hypnotised at others, subliminally etched again at other times. No one was born completely introverted or extroverted. Circumstances lead us there.
My introversion is a work in progress, a taste I have acquired, a longing for something I tasted long ago, a turmoiled state of flicking between personalities without the need to label it a disorder or a personality trait even.
Some of us are born that way, inward facing faces, we draw and look inwards for life elixir.
Some of those people have trouble handling their emotions after being told that they are this way by nature. There is no such thing.
This is another ploy of the dreadful twin dogs of human manipulation called psychiatry and psychology, the industries that for over a hundred and fifty years have made it a business to hold people captive in their own bodies, in their own minds, in their own souls and then with quackery-trickery make them pay financially, emotionally and spiritually for their pseudo industry, of which they have nothing but dogma with the exception of neuro-science and some related fields that are actually within the realms of science, psychiatry and psychology for the most part, are not!
Of no doubt, there are people who are naturally inclined to draw inwards, from birth, sensitive, understanding, compassionate, thoughtful, thinking, contemplating and more. They come to understand themselves later in life as the stigmas of society’s imprint on them when their mould just doesn’t sit in the comfortable cubicle of conformity.
This is only a rather new idea amongst what we deem modern and civilised society, but there is nothing civilised about stigmatising people, about segregating them into the slots of eye comfort, of ego comforts and of manipulative government comforts let alone false industry comforts.
In older societies, peoples conformity wasn’t as emphasised. Sure people still stigmatised and labelled the madmen, the ones who were brave enough to speak their minds and spill their souls, or sat on the outer edges of the norm, but there wasn’t this industry of manipulative quackery posed as valid authority sifting us into convenient boxes.
You can take from this what you will, or reject it completely, choosing otherwise to believe in the nomenclature of modern manipulations of humans, either way, be thankful some of us consciously choose introversion, contain ourselves and instead of being psychotic oppressors, go about our work mercifully leaving much of society alone. We know how to be out there, we can quite easily use our creativity, our imaginations and our wit to destruction, to oppression and manipulation, but we choose to live and let live to the truest meaning of those words