I learned a long time ago that the breadth of your insides depends on the breath you take inwardly.
I therefore chose to divert all my breathing direction inwardly.
I must have been five or so when I realised that people around me were busy caught up in the approval of their outward appearance amongst their peers and every time I found myself being lured into that world, I became angry at myself, and I would choke. My breath was being taken away from me, being sucked out into the atmosphere when it should have remained contained.
I knew my inner world would provide me with more solace and comfort than the outside world.
I was drawn to all things that provided me with much further and wider a horizon, twenty/twenty vision, wisdom, knowledge, courage, bravery, foresight, clemency, mercy, passion, love, empathy, acuteness and more. I continue to pursue and contain, breathe inward and remain.
It also makes you aware of how shallow everyone else’s breathing is. Try as you may, they won’t listen, they all take for granted their automation.
From this all, I learned to breathe from my stomach, deeper, meaningful breaths that reach my very essence, the element of me and bathe every cell in my body with life force of who I wanted to be. Ambitions were only a means to put some food in my mouth and clothes on my back, the treasure was inside, I had to keep stocking up and filling that chest.
Occasionally, some has to spill as my vessel can’t expand fast enough, but maybe with my last breath, it may be outwards instead. Only then will my introversion be known, only then will you smell my breath.
-W.E.
lonerloaner 